how odd it is that i find a small part of myself craving the loneliness and the anger i found comfort in when i was at my lowest part of my life

it’s become so rooted in my being that stability and small bouts of joy make me anxious

what am i missing what am i not seeing

i’ve traded my lethargy for stress and routine

i drive so that i don’t wander 
i talk so that i don’t ponder

i’m slowly deteriorating into a happier version of myself